Ingrown toenails aren’t pretty, deffo. I thought I was gonna die yesterday when the podiatrist tried to perform a partial nail avulsion without local anaesthetic. Don’t worry, I survived to tell you about it. She says that I will probably need a total nail avulsion, but at least this time I will get pain relief and they will apply phenol to stop it returning. Yay?
My dose of fluoxetine has been halved and I’m coming off it all together in a few weeks. All of this without major impact. I thought that I was suffering from “withdrawal” the first day, but it was just a surprise period. I’m curious to see if they become more regular without the fluoxetine.
I’m amazed that I am beginning to live without fluoxetine. While I initially thought that it was the devil, it became my saviour; I was terrified when coming off it was first suggested. Maybe, I will relapse at some point but for now I feel pretty good. I refuse to say that I am cured from depression – I don’t think that’s fully possible – however it’s under control and that’s a good feeling.
Reading: Mary Berry’s Ultimate Cake Book
Listening to: Queen + Adam Lambert Bohemian Rhapsody
Wearing: Long sleeved t-shirt, boyfriend shorts and Adidas trainers
Next Long Sleeved T-shirt – £6.50
Adidas Nizza Lo Trainers – £49
New Look boyfriend shorts – £10 (sale)
Feeling: Pretty good. I have lowered my dose of fluoxetine, but that’s another post.
Sleeping hours: 3am-1pm. Summer sleeping times are weird
Worried about: My blogging activity
Damn, who doesn’t love Etsy? It’s a quirky virtual market with something for everyone. Here are my five favourite things on Etsy at the moment:
For when you need a bit of inspiration – ACDShop
This year’s 11th/12th night bonfires have led to photos circulating the net of St Gall’s GAA Club jerseys being burnt on bonfires. Young children play for that team. Yes, hurling and Gaelic football are traditionally an Irish sport but how can it be considered a culture to burn another? I wonder if these are the same folks who were flying Nazi and Confederate flags…
At the bottom of the tires, you will see a blue shirt. That’s St Gall’s GAA shirt
Yesterday I reduced my dose of fluoxetine from 20mg to 10mg. Cue lying in bed not eating but craving a McDonalds, fighting with friends on Facebook and planning my will. It’s a start, but I am afraid that I will be considered “cured” from depression when the best way I can put it is “under control”. Some days I have been really on edge, and panic attacks have been creeping in.
I told my psychiatrist all of this, but she told me that I had to “feel” and while I agree, I don’t think telling me to start withdrawal when she is going on holiday for a month is wise. I feel better today, but tomorrow’s gym session may cause me to crash again. Oh, the joys.
“Gym? What gym?” I asked childishly, in a last ditch attempt to escape, but my promise had ensnared me and soon I was in workout gear in a gym. “Do you have money for a bottle of water?” I asked. “There’s a water fountain.” “But I want a bottle.” “I’m not going back to get money.” And so I was without a water bottle, nor did I know how to turn on the water fountain. Until a hot guy came up and turned it on for me, and I sprayed water all over my face in front of him.
In one hour I switched between ten machines, my commitment to each variable. I was sweaty and disgusting, and I didn’t have a bottle, or music.
Today I Learned:
- That I am even more unfit than I thought
- To bring a water bottle
- To bring music unless I want to be assaulted by embarrassing remixes of good songs